Goal-setting can seriously suck.
Okay, okay. Maybe goals don’t necessary suck exactly so let me tell you where I am coming from.
Can you remember a time where you wanted to achieve something REALLY bad? A desire that you just couldn’t squash? It could be getting that promotion. Maybe it’s a romantic relationship. For some of you, it could be health related such as weight loss. For most of my life, I just wanted happiness. But as my life unfolds, right now, it is establishing my platform to inspire and help others. Big stuff.
So, you do the work to get there and for many of us, this could mean hours and hours of time getting there. For some of us, it’s a desire that we manifest and we eventually get there.
Let’s be honest now. Have you ever achieved that goal and it fell flat? Maybe you thought, “is that it?”. Or, (this is a doozy) maybe you made the wrong decision? Ouch!
And then you move onto the next goal. And again and again and again the cycle continues…Oh, and let’s not forget that you then feel like shit because you didn’t achieve it.
Goal setting, for me, makes me extremely anxious. It is something that I have felt for as long as I can remember. Several years ago when I was unemployed and I applied on line for a job, the application for this position that I desperately wanted required me to convey my 6 month, 1 year, 5 year and 10 year goals. I was like “how can I lay down goals when I don’t even have the job yet”? Heck, I didn’t have ANY job at the time so setting goals for the next day was a big leap.
A few years ago, a book called The Fire Starter Sessions by Danielle Laporte came across my desk/life and eventually, it’s follow up book, The Desire Map came along with it. And, it turned my perspective of goal setting on it’s head entirely.
I’d been thinking about goal setting all wrong. And considering that I had suffered from anxiety and stress for many years, no wonder this traditional goal setting approach got me all worked up!
What if, first, we got clear on how we actually wanted to feel in our life, and then we laid out our intentions? What if your most desired feelings consciously informed how you plan your day, your year, your career, your holidays — your life? – Danielle LaPorte
For the past two years, I’ve used my feelings and desires as my compass towards achieving those goals. Danielle calls them our “Core Desired Feelings“. This year, I chose FEARLESSNESS and took a stab at interviewing women online who inspire me to help inspire you all towards impactful changes in your life. This year, I ended a business opportunity that could have helped me leave my “secure day job” but that actually created more stress and anxiety in my life. When I did end it, it opened up more time for me to work on inspiring work for you. And, this year, I chose to take advantage of experiences that would bring me JOY (check this quick video out) so I could laugh my ass off!
I’ll continue to feel those feelings that will move me towards my desires. Here are my Core Desired Feelings for 2016:
I want the same for you. Go to Danielle Laporte.com to learn more about the resources available to help you develop your goals with soul in all areas in your life. I personally downloaded the e-version so that I could listen to the book on my way to and from work or when I just need some inspiration in the kitchen.
Here’s to an amazing 2016 year for all of us!